I get asked all the time, what does it mean to be a coach? What do coaches do, and how are they different from therapists or other helping professions?

A coach will work with you, in equal partnership to create positive and lasting change. There are many principles of coaching that help achieve this.

The first and most important principle of coaching is the mind that holds the problem, holds the solution. There are many implications to this mantra, most important of which is that as a coach, we don’t provide solutions, and rarely even offer advice. Our role is to ask questions, listen mindfully and provide insight and observation when necessary, to help you discover the solutions for yourself.

In coaching, we believe the coachee is a whole person, completely capable and able to manage the challenges they are facing. What might be missing however, is awareness, objectivity and accountability. In our sessions, we help to bring awareness to underlying assumptions, and any limiting beliefs that might be holding you back.

Objectivity is achieved when we move from the subjective stories about our lives, to the objective truth. Honesty and authenticity are necessary for this transition. As coaches we may challenge your story at times to discover fresh perspectives.

Accountability is a struggle for many of us. We often understand our goals, know what we could be doing to achieve them and still fall short because we haven’t instilled accountability into our process. A good coach will assist you with the process of accountability and track progress as you work towards your better life.

While there is some overlap in these processes with other helping professions such as therapy, there are important distinctions. First, in therapy for example, there is a heavy focus on the past, and understanding the source and root of issues. Sometimes, it may be necessary to understand the history to avoid the same mistakes and ensure accountability, however as a coach, we really don’t spend much time in that space.

Second, in therapy there is the idea that you are broken, and need fixing. As coaches we believe you already have the necessary tools to work towards progress.

Coaching is not for everyone, and neither is therapy. Some challenges including those which require medical intervention such as depression and severe anxiety aren’t suitable for coaching. In those cases, a therapist or a medical professional would be more appropriate.

When choosing what helping professional you’d like to try, keep in mind that we have the concept of coachability as well. Not everyone can be coached.

To be coachable, you must have these three criteria :

1. Have an area you are dissatisfied with
2. A vision for change
3. Willingness to do the work

In my experience almost everyone can benefit from some coaching, and so part of becoming a good coach, and good coachee is to adopt the coaching mindset in all aspects of our lives. The coaching mindset is one of curiosity, non-judgment and growth.

When we are curious about our thoughts, our relationships, our goals and our beliefs we ask informative questions that lead us to greater awareness and clarity. There is great power in adopting a curious mindset in all areas of our lives.

Non-judgment is absolutely necessary to create a safe space for people to explore. There is no place for judgment in coaching, and as a coach it’s critical to manage your own biases and beliefs in order to allow the coachee the space to explore. Non-judgment is incredibly valuable as it is rare in the general population.

One of the most important aspects of achieving our goals, is to understand what’s getting in the way. We call this a competing commitment. We often find that people know what they want, and how to get it, but they are still stuck because there is a hidden pay off for staying where they are.

Finally, adopting a growth mindset means that in all areas of our life we seek improvement. Often, the improvement is increased gratitude, satisfaction and contentment. We don’t mean growth, in the traditional sense of having more money or stuff.

There is truly a lot that comes from coaching, and it is distinct from other helping sessions in it’s approach. If you are looking to make a positive change in your life, are willing to do the work and want to try coaching, book an introductory session with me today!